Monday, March 31, 2008

Et Tu, LC?

Dear Lauren,**
I hate to reach for the obvious here (I really do), but HELLO!? GLASS HOUSES!? Stephanie Pratt? Really??

While my deep, penetrating hatred for Spencer has been unwavering over the past two seasons, I'm shocked to discover that after tonight's episode of The Hills, I'm actually sort of on team Heidi regarding the She Pratt issue.

Yep, here I am.

I've seen the preview from next week of you looking all bug-eyed and hurt when Audrina cops to allowing Heidi to come pick her stuff up at the apartment, and yet you see no problemo whatsoever with practically holding hands with She Pratt and skipping to your loo through the quad? I don't get it.

Except that I do.

I totally get it.

You have zero desire to actually be friends with She Pratt--its just that you know, you KNOW that this friendship will incense SPHeidi so deeply, so profoundly, and so insanely that I can actually see the little dribbles of drool forming at the corner of your mouth when you think about it. I know you are fantasizing about Spencer putting his hand through a bathroom stall door at Hyde or Heidi making a scene at Kitson after finding out some juicy detail about your newfound BFF. I know you are manipulating She Pratt with every innocent looking toothy smile and every chuckle at her lame, no doubt, poorly executed jokes. I can read you like a Kindle.

I still hope Spencer gets attacked by killer bees and has a piano fall on his shiny "present from mom and dad" car, but my white hot hatred for Heidi is a bit luke warm these days. I might even go download her song.

It pains me to say this , but I'm sort of over you, LC.


P.S. Your fifth grade, tantrum throwing tatics regarding Brody's new GF are not helping matters. You need to get a grip pronto.

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