Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Would You Like A Condom With That Kidsmeal, Flavor Flav?


Dear Parents, **

Shit. I feel sorry for you people...I really do.

The world used to be a way simpler place. I mean, there actually used to be a time when you didn't need to worry about strangers with candy, anthrax in the mail and...your kids doin' the nasty at six.

I mean, YOUR kids are probably not knockin boots at pre-school, but it is happening out there in the world. And as with most social and moral dilemmas of our day, Flavor Flav's house is ground fucking zero:

(interview with Complex)

Complex: How uh…when was this?
Flavor Flav: This was when I was real, real, real, real, young.

Complex: Like elementary school? Or middle school?
Flavor Flav: Nah, I’m a tell you the truth; I lost my virginity when I was 6 years old.

Complex: Really?
Flavor Flav: Yea, man. Because you know we learned to have done the nasty back in the days, and me and this girl we experiment, we were experimenting, and my little joint got hard, I penetrated for about a few seconds.

Uhm.

Wow.

Six-year-old Flavor Flav peen wood.

Good morning, America!
me

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