Dear Mr. X (if that's even your real name) *
I am in receipt of your above missive.
And I would like you to know that I have taken these matters into consideration, given them my due dilligence, and come to the following conclusion: back the fuck off, dude.
First of all, you don't know me like at all. I fucking hate LOLcats, and I can has NO cheezburger.
As for my computer addiction, so the fuck what?? I'm also addicted to:
- TV
- skinny cow flying saucers
- Diet Coke
- Pinkberry/Red Mango
- counting how many times Rafael Nadal picks his butt during each tennis match
- Air Conditioning
And, believe me, the world does not miss me. The world is sick of me. The world wants my ass to shut the fuck up (you read those Michael Phelps haterade comments???). And the world especially does NOT give a shit if I show up to a motherfucking meetup group or not.
So, thanks for your note...and for your concern.
(EPIC FAIL)
rubba dub dub dub (dot dear famous asshole dot blogspot dot com),
me
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