JUST FUCKING VOTE!!!!

Dear Everyone, ***

This is a really, really, really important day. Like R-E-A-L-L-Y fucking important.

This day is gonna be epic. It's gonna be legendary.

It's gonna be talked about for years and years to come.

Can you hang?

Are you down? Are you gonna step up to the plate?

Or R you gonna sit on the sidelines like some monkey fucker douchetard?

Cause here's the thing: if you don't vote, you can't be a part of it all...you've got no stake...and quite simply: you suck.

It really IS just that cut and dry.

You've got to haul your ass out to the polls today. You have GOTS to vote. You've GOTTA DO IT. No if, ands, or buts motherfuckers.

Here's why:

1. BITCHING - If you don't vote, you can't complain and/or whine like a little fucking bitch. You really wanna give up that privilege?
2. PUSSY - If you vote, you will get laid. Srsly....I'm not kidding. Your ass is gonna be on line for hours...you could pick up some serious fly honey action if you bring your A game. Get some numbers. Work it...its gonna be a target rich environment.
3. HOOKY - Do you like going to work? Didn't fucking think so. If there just "happens" to be "reallllly long lines" at the poll, and your ass shows up late, oh wells!
4. STICKERS - Who wants an "I voted" sticker!? [raises hand].

Also, we live in a democracy, yo. And like it or not, this shit is important.

AND, if we have any hope of getting Barack Obama elected...turning this country around...and getting our asses back on the yellow brick road, it's even more important than ever.

YOU.

MUST.

BARACK.

THE.

VOTE.

Some tips:

*If you live in New York state and are unsure where you need to go to vote, look yourself up here on the Board of Elections site. I'm voting early tomorrow morn at P.S. 321 in Park Slope, Brooklyn. See you there, motherfuckers!

*If you live in any other part of the country, check out Google's handy dandy polling map which will fill you in on who, what, where and when (today, bias!) you can go to Rock the vote.

*While you are Baracking, you should video your election day experience and post it on Video Your Vote's youtube page.

*The NY Times is asking you to post pics of yourself at your polling place and take part in "the largest online archive of election photographs taken by citizens across the U.S."

*NY Mag is looking for personal photos and/or self portraits documenting your election day experiences. Send pics with caption info by 4pm tomorrow to: election@nymag.com.

*Do you Twitter? (I do). If so, "tweet" your election day experience with the #votereport hashtag so that others can follow.

*Leave a comment here, yo! Tell me about what went down...the good, the bad and the ugly. I wanna hear allll the juicy lowdown.

*After you vote, there are loads of fab places you could go hang out on election night to watch the results. I'll probs be too damn nervous to go to any of em.

So, in summary: VOTEVOTEVOTEVOTEVOTEVOTE.

kthxbye,
me.

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