Thursday, May 15, 2008

Let's Unleash the "Bod Squad" on All Your Haters, Amanda Lorber!

Dear Amanda, ***

Just caught up on Monday night's ep and I had a couple of ideas for some new post-it notes you could hang around your room:

  • "Gianna is scheming jealous little hussie!"
  • "Alex has z-e-r-o backbone!"
  • "Trevor is the layout editor because he can't read!"
  • "Adam is a wittle bitty cwy baby!"
Ok, perhaps my post-it notes are not quite as inspirational as yours are, but those loud-mouth, delusional staffers of yours deserve to be punched in the face--every last one of them (except, of course, for Cassia and your other friend--who rocks pretty freakin' hard for standing up for you at the editor's meeting).

Holy freakin' ridiculousness.

That anyone in that entire school is still under the hilariously insane impression that Giana, Alex or anyone else but you should have been editor, is beyond my comprehension. Giana!? An Editor-in-Chief!? That's coo coo for cocoa puffs.

I hate to say it, but I think its officially time to kick Alex to the curb. He's way too hung up on fitting in with the "cool" kids and he totally doesn't get that he's making a huge mistake by hitchin' himself to the wrong wagon. You two could rule the school, but he's far too busy giving Giana a bikini wax and teaching Trevor the alphabet to ever put that puzzle together.

So keep on keepin' on ALo. Because, I cannot w-a-i-t until you have some fab development deal with the network in a few years or some kickass job writing for Samantha Who or the Daily Show and Giana and her bitch brigade can sit around in their community college dorm rooms eating their bitchtastic hearts out all the live long day.

In Chief we trust,

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