Tuesday, July 15, 2008

SYTYCD News Flash: Jessica Has Gotten Her Ass Fedoke'd!

Dear Fellow SYTYCD Freaks of Nature, ***

Wow, bitches.

M-A-J-O-R news breakin wide open all over the internets: COMFORT IS BACK!

Apparently, Miss Jessica, aka Will's Kryptonite, has gone off and injured her damn self. Here's what our favorite leather clad Executive Producer Nigel Lythgoe had to say: "I'm afraid I can't be specific. ... I've been instructed not to discuss the injury...We'll be specific on the show."

Ohhh Kaaay.

Let me be the first to make a very SPECIFIC guess about exactly what happened: unable to handle rehearsals for one more freakin day with that dead weight around his neck like an Albatross, Will threw that bitch Jessica down a flight of stairs and she broke her ankle. Boo yah!

Fine, so Will is way too much of a gentleman to have ever done that...but Mia Michaels would! I Knew it! It was totally that bitch Mia Michaels!

Anyway, as a result of these shenanigans, Comfort is back (Jeezus, how PISSED are you, Thayne? Ouch).

So here is our new and slightly improved list of Top 10 Dancers:
*Joshua (do me rag) Allen
*Stephen "Twitch" (ur my bitch) Boss
*Comfort (blah, blah, meh) Fedoke
*Courtney (girl crush) Galiano
*Chelsie (I want to stab you) Hightower
*Mark (u know u want me) Kanemura
*Gev (u spin me right round) Manoukian
*Kherington (I'm as transparent as a window...) Payne
*Katee (big girls don't cry) Shean
*William (free at last, free at last, thank God almighty I'm free at last!) Wingfield

Tune in tomorrow for the real dramz.

Comfort-ably numb,

Related Posts by Categories

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

The last two posts have been off the chain. Hell Yeah Mother Fuckas!