SYTYCD Week 5 Eliminations: Comfort & Thayne Wrecked Themselves Before They Checked Themselves

Dear Comfort & Thayne, ***

Wow, bitches. Your time has f-i-n-a-l-l-y come.

Your departure, while not at all a surprise, is a teeny bit bittersweet for me--especially in the case of Thayne who, despite the annoying smile olympics, happens to be an insanely talented, kick ass dancer (as evidenced last night in your solo). But when you gotta go, you gotta go, so...

Comfort: I'm gonna be straight with you sis, and tell you this: I never felt you this season--Like not even once. Not even during the auditions when Nigel was all "you may be the best female hip hop dancer we've ever had on this show," and I was all "WHAAAA???" I mean, yeah...you can kick it-n-shit but that's about it for me, dawg. Also all your complaining about your arm and the clickin...and SHUT IT. That bugged big time. But the final telling moment for me, I think, is after you got your ass served to you on a platter last night. Cat was practically humping Thayne on the stage with her goodbye hug but was like not paying any attention to your ass, AT ALL. Cat is pretty much my own fucking moral compass, so if she wasn't shining her heart light, I've got nothing.

Thayne: You did need to go last night, no question, BUT, also your solo was one of the most beautifully danced pieces I have ever seen on that stage. You've obvs got mad talent and superfly technique and it might have just been that they paired you up with the wrong partner and you just weren't getting lucky with your dance picks. I mean, your smiling did not help at all, so there was also that. But now it seems like Mia Michaels has a major hard on for your ass, so like I'm not worried about your future in the least.

In other news: I kissed a girl, and I liked it too. Also, can someone please remind Katy Perry to wear an actual dress next time she performs?

Thanks.

L8 bitches,
me

p.s. OH...opening number = awesomeness. Tab-poleon rock it out, yet again.

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