Kanye West Blogs His Fuckin Face Off: Weekly Wrap Up 7.13.08

Dear Everyone, ***

Let's get real: Rosie is fun-n-all, but in the world of celebrity blogging, it doesn't really get much better than Kanye West.

Eschewing typical boring ass myspace posts, or gimmicky memes like a retarded staring contest (I'm talking to YOU, Jessica Alba), Kanye gives us access to all the most important shit in life: i.e. hot, sexxy bitches, out of reach architecture, furniture, art, technology and fashion, and, oh yeah, more hot, sexxy, bikini-clad bitches.

Though in the past Kanye's blog love could easily be categorized as on again/off again, these days, it's on. Like, seriously on.

So,for those of you who might have trouble keeping up with the fast and furious daily updates on Kanye's blog, as a public service to all we offer up our first weekly edition of: Kanye Blogs His Fuckin Face Off.

We here at Dear Famous Asshole are committed to bringing you a thorough and content-rich weekly summary of everything and anything on Kanye's mind. We will leave no stone unturned, no hot model without inappropriate body part by body part comparisons, and no all caps Kanye rants without analysis.

As we've already established, there are really only two ways to BE in this world: your way and Kanye's way, and, quite frankly, we prefer to BeKanye.

So here's what Kanye is blogging his fuckin face off about this week (please note that all updates will be posted on Monday and, therefore, will reflect Kanye's general state of mind from the previous week):

KANYE IS NOT ANGRY...NOT AT ALL, Y'ALL: Goddammit, bitches, when will you realize that just cuz someone occasionally forgets that his CAPS LOCK is on during an all day blogfest, does not mean that he has anger management issues. As Kanye himself points out to us, if anything, he needs help learning how to be angrier! LOL!

Fave comment in response:

ElNegro | July 7, 2008

THIS IS WHY PEOPLE LOVE KANYE. KANYE, YOU LIKE THE FLY BILL BANKS--THE COOL STEVE URKEL. I AGREE WITH JENNJENN THERE'S OTHER SHIT GOING ON BESIDES THIS MAN. AND AINT YOU HITTING THAT UP WITH SELITA EBANKS?
-RASHEED

(punctuation mine)

LOTS OF HOME DECORATING TIPS THIS WEEK: For those who might be looking for something a bit more out of the ordinary than a typical bedside lamp, this is an interesting idea? Or if that ain't your bag, how bout this skull & crossbones chandelier? I'm totally digging these SOS chairs...esp since they seem to have a "no clothing policy," and this lit up LED bench would look damn fine with Lauren London's ass splayed all across it--canIgeta hells, yeah!? For caffiene afficianados, this pod-based capuccino/espresso machine is pretty sexy, and this IGA Chair has a great spot to store your porno mags built right in!

Fave comment in response to the SOS chairs:

rett | July 8, 2008

Why is everyone asking why the people are naked? Don't ya'll know sex sells!!! lol
Those chairs are dope as hell!!!

HOTT, SEXXY BITCHES OF THE WEEK: Chanta Patton offers us up a nice mix of trashy stripper posed, wannabe porn shots and a coupla slightly artistic b&w snaps. [You're hot, babydoll, but you need to do something about that hair pronto]. This week's nearly anorexic honey award goes to Callie Mahoney (above) who, based on her lack of stripper-posed pics seems to be a genuine, bonafide model. Liya Kebede is our next entrant in the 'real model' group, and she is, indeed, gorge...beyond...and was one of the models featured in the Black issue of Italian Vogue this month. And, of course, we can't forget my afore mentioned bench bitch: Lauren London.

Fave comment in response to Callie Mahoney pics (and my new BF):

e_rich | July 9, 2008

She ain't got no ass and she looks like she smokes a lot of cigarettes. I'd also like to be the first to say that she doesn't look too different from those King/Smooth magazine models from how she takes pictures with her legs open and they focus on her non-existant ass.

FASHION FRENZY: Kanye wants you to look good, y'all...which you WILL if you go out and immediately buy some of these Gucci sneaks. Viktor & Rolf steps up to meet Kanye's incessant need for pink threads and, uhm...Raf Simons is some Belgian fashion designer (see above; one of Kanye's faves!). Also Jay-Z is in L'uomo Vogue this month (implication: Kanye is not...why?).

Fave comment in response to the Raf pics:

livin_a_movie | July 9, 2008

LMAO at the whole first page of posts. Dogg, that shit is borderline womenswear! I know its runway shit, but let's be realistic. LOL.

I'M RICH, UR NOT: And in our "you poor ass bitches might actually even be able to afford this shit" entry of the week, I give you: an Ikea designed coffin.

WEEKLY WILDCARD: Who the fuck would want to go to Dubai, when you're not even allowed to have sex in public!?

I don't know about you bitches, but I could use a motherfuckin drink. Thankfully, I listened to Yeezy and bought myself an Angelshare single-bottle storage device, so my vino just now reached the perf temp. I gotta jam.

Remember: It's Kanye's world...we're all just livin in it.

BeKanye, or else what's the fuckin point?
m.e.

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