Dear Elisabeth Hasselbeck, *
For the love of all that is holy and pure, won't you PUH-LEEZ, once and for all, SHUT YOUR MOTHERFUCKING FACE UP!?
I would agree to wear a purity ring for the rest of my life, if you said yes.
I've noted the following and judged accordingly: how the tone of your voice morphs into that of 14-year-old pre-pubescent teenaged boy; your feeble, pathetic attempt at humor (you cannot do funny, Liz...at ALL); and that shit-eating, self-important smirk of yours.
And here's what I've come up with: Goddammit, you're an annoying bitch!